Love One Another (John 13:34-35)

There’s something captivating about stories of love—real love, the kind that transforms lives. The world is filled with its own ideas of what love should be, and most of the time, they fall far short of what Jesus calls us to. Take, for example, The Great Gatsby. Gatsby was a man who devoted his entire life to one pursuit: winning back Daisy Buchanan. He built his wealth, threw extravagant parties, and sacrificed everything to recreate the past, believing that if he could just have Daisy, he would finally be satisfied. But what happened? His love, as passionate as it seemed, wasn’t real love at all. It was a self-serving idol, rooted in an illusion, and ultimately, it failed him. Contrast that with Jesus, the night before His death, kneeling to wash His disciples’ feet—even Judas’s, the one about to betray Him. No grasping, no illusions—just pure, giving love. THAT’S the love He calls us to. In John 13:34-35, Jesus says, ‘A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know you are my disciples.’ This isn’t optional. It’s our mark. Today, let’s see what it means to love like Him—and why it’s so hard.

The Standard—Love Like Jesus

Jesus doesn’t say, ‘Love however you feel like.’ He says, ‘As I have loved you.’ His love sets the bar. Think about it. In Matthew 8, a leper begs for healing. Jesus doesn’t just heal from afar. He touches him, a man no one dared touch. His love gets close. Or Luke 5, He eats with tax collectors, the outcasts. He believes that they can change when no one else does. In John 8 He forgives a woman caught in sin, not because she earned it, but because His love outshines her shame. And in John 13, hours from the cross, He washes feet—including Judas’s. That’s radical. Humble. Unconditional. Not waiting for loyalty, not tallying who deserves it, just giving. That’s our standard. A love that serves, even when it costs us." A love that isn’t self-seeking or transactional, expecting something in return, but a love that gives because it reflects the heart of God.

The Purpose—This Is How the World Knows Us

Why this standard? Jesus didn’t say people would recognize us by our theological arguments, by how often we attend church services, or by how much knowledge we have. Because Jesus says, "By this everyone will know you’re mine." Our love isn’t just for us, it’s a sign for others to see. Look at Acts 2:44-47: the early church shared everything, met needs, and lived sacrificially. People noticed. Or Acts 10 where Peter, a Jew, learns to love Cornelius, a Gentile, breaking every cultural wall. That love changed history. Paul’s words in Galatians 3:28, ‘There is neither Jew nor Gentile,’ reshaped how we see human worth. History is forever marked by Christians who believed that every human soul is worthy of dignity and God's love.

What about us? Does our love stand out? I hope so, but honestly, we’re often too independent, too disconnected to show it. That’s why we’re pushing this year to lean into each other. If we love like Jesus, the world will see Him in us.

The Challenge—Overcoming Barriers to Love

Now, if Jesus commands us to love like Him, the real questions is, "Why don't we?" Why is it so hard and what holds us back? Perhaps there are multiple things that keep us from loving as we should, but here are three.

Fear

For many, it’s fear. We fear rejection, vulnerability, or being taken advantage of. Ever hesitate to reach out because you might get burned? I have. But 1 John 4:18 says, “There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear.” Loving like Jesus means pushing past fear, even when it’s risky. John’s saying that true, mature love—God’s kind of love—doesn’t coexist with fear. They’re opposites. When you’re secure in love, fear loses its grip. "Perfect" here (Greek: teleios) means complete or mature. It’s the love God has for us, shown in Christ, and the love we’re growing into as we abide in Him. This love actively expels fear, like light pushing out darkness. It’s not just that fear fades—it’s driven out by love’s power. 

Fear assumes love isn’t enough. If we’re still dominated by fear, we haven’t fully grasped or matured in God’s love. His love isn't our chief treasure. If we’re afraid—of rejection, vulnerability, or loss—we’ll hold back from loving others fully. We love the idea of being loved more than we love God. Jesus loved sacrificially, even knowing betrayal awaited (John 13:1-17). Fear makes us self-protective; love makes us self-giving. John wants believers to love boldly, not shrink back.

Pride

Others struggle with pride. Pride makes us believe that we deserve recognition, that our needs come first, and that humility is weakness. Pride says, ‘I deserve better. Serve me first.’ But Jesus flips that. Philippians 2:3 tells us, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves.”

Look at Jesus. The night before His crucifixion, He knelt down and washed the feet of His disciples—including Peter, who would deny Him, and Judas, who would betray Him. That’s humility in action. Jesus, who had every right to demand service, chose instead to serve. His love was not about proving status but about giving Himself completely for others.

Pride tells us to demand for others to serve us, but love like Jesus’ calls us to serve first. When we hold onto pride, we struggle to listen, to admit faults, or to seek reconciliation. But love requires that we lower ourselves, that we care more about others than about being right. Jesus modeled this in Philippians 2:5-8, where Paul says He "made Himself nothing" and took on the role of a servant. Pride builds walls; His love tears them down.

If you’re finding it hard to love someone, ask yourself: is pride in the way? Are you waiting for them to come to you, or are you willing to take the first step toward humility and love?

Unforgiveness

Some of us carry past hurts and unforgiveness. When we’ve been hurt, we build walls, convincing ourselves that holding onto the pain protects us from being hurt again. But in reality, it isolates us. We justify our grudges, thinking, "They don’t deserve my love." . But Jesus shows us a different way.

Ephesians 4:32 reminds us, “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” Look at Jesus on the cross. As He suffered, He didn’t hold bitterness against those who mocked Him, beat Him, or nailed Him there. Instead, He prayed, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing” (Luke 23:34). If Jesus could forgive from the cross, what right do we have to hold onto bitterness?

Unforgiveness doesn’t just harm the person who wronged us—it poisons our own hearts. When we refuse to forgive, we carry a burden we were never meant to bear. But choosing forgiveness doesn’t mean excusing sin or pretending hurt never happened. It means releasing the debt, just as Jesus released ours. If you find it difficult to forgive, start with prayer. Ask God to soften your heart and help you see others through His eyes. Forgiveness is not always immediate, but it is necessary. Only when we let go of past hurts can we truly love like Jesus.

Conclusion: The Love That Will Change the World

So, what do we do? How do we love like Jesus? It starts with Him.

• Immerse yourself in His love—Ephesians 3:18 says grasp we need to grasp the length, width, height, and depth of His love.
• Serve humbly—Galatians 5:13 calls us to it.
• Forgive—Ephesians 4:32 shows us how.
• Pray for His heart—Ezekiel 36:26 promises a new one.
• Lean on the Spirit—Galatians 5:22 says love is His fruit, not ours alone. Jesus didn’t say our smarts or success prove we’re His. He said our love does.

This week, pick one step: Face a fear and reach out. Drop pride and serve. Forgive someone and let it go. Because when we love like Jesus, the world doesn’t just see us—it sees Him.

Jesus didn’t say our success would show the world who we belong to. He didn’t say our morality would prove our discipleship. He said our love would. A love that gives, that forgives, that serves, that breaks down barriers. A love that is more than words.

So let me ask you—if someone examined your life, would they see the love of Jesus? Would they recognize you as His disciple? Or are there barriers that need to come down?

When we love like Jesus, the world will know who we belong to.